12/08/2008: "Wrapping up the semester"

music: Regina Spektor - "The Call"
mood: Tired

Yesterday was Joshua's birthday. We had amazing vegan food at Sunflower Restaurant and we saw Bolt, which made me cry. The hamster in the movie reminded us so much of Mango!

Now it is exam week. One exam down, three to go. I have not enjoyed this semester at all. I know that political science is relevant to me because I want to be an activist, but the semester has made me so tired of it. In January I'm going to be taking a course about the animal mind, so hopefully I should feel more positive about class at that point.

I'm finding life at campus to be less and less desirable and each day just brings me closer to freedom. I've finally accepted the distance that has grown between those I called my friends freshman year and me. I guess it was inevitable... My life and mind are really elsewhere, not here on this campus. I can't wait to move on and embrace new things. But it makes me wonder if I'm always going to be living my life waiting for what's next...

Sharing another poem I wrote in high school (2005 or 2006) just because.

Beyond Glib

You peel your skin, scrape it away,
and shove it into a jar of marmalade
to serve your husband for breakfast.
Your friends see the glinting smiles, laughter,
played smoothly on your lips
but I see your soul.

The labels of your kitchen canned soups and
pre-frozen TV dinners
glimmer with nineteen-fifties' charm...
"100 essential vitamins in every bite"
and "recommended by twelve out of thirteen dermatologists."
(The last one never really matters.)

Your eye makeup smears across your taut powdered cheeks
and your face is invisible.
But your eyes shine through somehow and
you know one day this world will recede
in the final days of superficiality.